We all have good days and bad days. What I try to remind my children (and myself) is that it is okay to feel it.
Feel your tears, feel your anger, feel your frustration, and feel your joy. While you’re feeling all the feels though, your next responsibility is to deliberately act upon them rather than “knee-jerk” react to them. How you choose to react is what matters most. As with all things emotional it is easier said than done, but the results are well worth it and in fact the children seem to be much more successful at it than most adults. In our family we have four characters all with big feelings. We’re constantly on a journey to figure out ways to react individually and to support as a family. One thing that has always been powerful for me is music. This is something that I definitely get from my dad and both my children seem to have that experience as well. I know that all is well in life when after my pre-teen daughter has ripped my head off, screamed my ears off and stormed out, but then I hear her belting out her favourite songs in the other room as she gets ready for her afternoon activities. Henry and I talk about lyrics a lot and it helps him wrap his mind around so many things (although we haven’t gotten into “I took a pill in Ibiza” and what that could possibly mean) it also gives me a tiny window into his very tightly sealed mind.
Lyrics are a funny thing. The kids are often fighting over what specific lines are, but these days all you have to do is pull up lyrics online to clear up any confusion. Today, a song that I love came on and it reminded me that I really really wanted to walk down the aisle to this song. The problem was that I didn’t think the lyrics “like a piss in the sea” would be so good for walking down the aisle to. My then fiancĂ©e told me he was pretty sure that it was “like a fish in the sea”, but I wasn’t convinced. Today, after I heard the song come on the radio I blasted the music in my car because I needed a good dose of a song. It brought me right back to that time in my life. And Dan, you were right, it is “like a fish in the sea”.
Follow Me
You don’t know how you met me
You don’t know why
You can’t turn around and say goodbye
All you know is when I’m with you
I make you free
And swim through your veins like a fish in the sea
I’m singin’
Follow me everything is alrightI’ll be the one to tuck you in at night
And if you
Want to leave I can guarantee
You won’t find nobody else like me
I’m not worried ’bout the ring you wearCuz as long as no one knows than nobody can care
You’re feelin’ guilty and I’m well aware
But you don’t look ashamed and baby I’m not scared
I’m singin’
Won’t give you moneyI can’t give you the sky
You’re better off if you don’t ask why
I’m not the reason that you go astray and
We’ll be all right if you don’t ask me to stay
You don’t know how you met meYou don’t know why
You can’t turn around and say goodbye
All you know is when I’m with you
I make you free
And swim through your veins like a fish in the sea
I’m singin’