Parenting… aw heck… life is complicated. We breeze through some parts and struggle, hugging the ground for dear life in other parts. Everything is rarely what it seems. And yet, we all find some kind of sick comfort in criticizing one another… some more than others.
I am not writing this about any one particular incident but when I hit publish I know a handful of people who can, just this past month, week, day, hour, relate.
Maybe I’m naive… Ok yeah I’m naive a lot but it works for me. I see the best in people. I truly believe people are all good but make bad choices. Perhaps it’s a way I protect myself because my skin is as thick as a fresh picked raspberry so I need to see things through rosé [autocorrect sic but I like it] coloured glasses to not live in a constant state of fright or sadness.
On the other hand, I am an extremely judgmental person. I save my voice for things that matter to me though. I also save my judgment for those I love. If I care about you… I drag you along my crazy path. I expect the same from you as I do myself.
For example, recently ,on a Facebook page I follow, the owner of the page wrote something anti Semitic. I wrote a simple ‘not ok’. That’s the amount of time I gave it. I did not unfriend. I did not go further into it. He ‘s either ignorant or anti-Semitic. So be it. I even hate giving it extra time and attention here but it is a recent illustration of how I am.
My husband on the other hand, who I love dearly, the poor man often gets nit-picked to death. To a fault, I’m working on it, I ask why he does things a certain way, and try to make him more efficient (aka my way is better… because it truly is more efficient *tongue in cheek*) since time is what we seem to lack the most. What I am learning is that just because I am crazily trying to make our lives more efficient, letting someone be and do things their way, not just your children but your husband too is not only ok, but really important.
We each see one part of everyone’s big picture… don’t assume you know what the rest of that big picture is.
Just accept that we are all perfect… perfectly imperfect.
Even as his aunt and knowing him from his infancy, it took me quite a while to learn and to accept that he has his own way of doing things and that his way works quite well for him even when I don’t understand exactly how it works <3
I’m reading this a bit late but I love this post. I myself just wrote a blog on my struggle to accept the fact that I’m not perfect and try as I might tomorrow I’m not likely to be perfect. Thank you so much for putting this out there. It feels good to know I’m not the only one.
Thanks!
Thanks and ditto.